R.D. Boucher
1 min readJun 13, 2022

How is it

that you are in my dreams

when I’m grieving another?

Your scent as crisp

as the days

when we were

capable of closeness

when you were mine,

when this was ours.

You keep visiting me

with questioning eyes

wanting me,

touching me,

kissing me,

professing your love to me,

while you are about

to marry another

and I am reminded

upon waking

that there is no future

only memories

that are packaged

as what could be

but was never meant

should never have begun

While I lay,

while I rest my head

upon my pillow

with loss of the present

weighing on my heart

I cannot understand

why it is you

that enters my mind

Why it is you

within my subconscious,

and not the ones

that I have now

committed myself to

and them to me

Why it is always you

Am I to be forever tortured?

by your voice

your smile

you smell —

the smell that to this day

I cannot find a match,

nor a likeness,

never does a stranger

pass me by

and smell of you

It is only yours

and it is all I have to truly remember you by



R.D. Boucher

Dami grew up in Hillside, NJ and attended Rutgers University in New Brunswick, NJ. She is currently working on her PhD in Santa Cruz, CA.